MIFF Review - The Lobster

Words - Julia Howland Photos - Courtesy of MIFF

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MIFF Review - The Lobster

So I went to see this film with a date. A really hot date. It was meant to be a "date night," ya know where you go see a film, then go to dinner, then slobber on each other's faces for a while. It was going to be great! When we got to the cinema there was a massive queue of people on standby to get in.

I only had one ticket. There were two of us.

Someone had to stay behind.

 

But you see, the deal was, MIFF gives me one free ticket, I write a review.

Sorry pal.

So with an awkward hug and a "I'll call you when it finishes."  I walked into the theatre.

 

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I'm a massive dickhead.

 

Ironically the film was about a dystopian society where everyone HAD to be married, with a partner, you were NOT ALLOWED TO BE ALONE. If you were alone, say your partner just passed away or your marriage certificate expired, you were sent to a "hotel" and given 45 days to find another mate. If, however, you did not find someone to lock genitals with, you were turned into an animal of your choice.

 

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Colin Farrell was awkward and chubby. Rachel Weisz was sweaty and had no make up on. Both were beautiful.

But personally I would just ask to be turned into a cat and be done with it.

 

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